how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

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What's the difference between and black dick and a white dick? To get to the other side

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what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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Well You're Full Of It . -Full Of What ? Well , Probably Blood And Other Organs You Can't Live Without . .

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

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What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

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whats worse than the holocaust? i don't know, the holocaust was pretty bad.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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Did you hear the one about the man who kept losing his memory? I don't remember how it goes... by the way, did you hear the one about the man who kept losing his memory?

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Once upon a time there was a man sleeping, Then he woke up.

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What did Robin do in between crime fighting? He had a paper route.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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