What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve

You know whats worse than getting punched in the face? Getting kicked in the balls.

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

Why did the kid fail? He procrastinated.

I like pancakes. I like pancakes. We have no pancakes

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

The WNBA

Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

Whats worse than finding an worm in your apple? 1942 BERLIN

What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

What do you call a building full of black people Jail

Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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