The real reason you go to college is.... To learn more about what you want to do in life.

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Rachel not blowing Robert.

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Why did the white girl fuck the mexican? Because her teacher told her to do an "essay"

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Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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Why did the bus driver have a bad day? Someone threw a washing machine filled with radios but containing no soap at his bus. Then, a kid stapled a frog to his face. His wife died of terminal cancer.

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How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

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Look whos talking Matt Critchley

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What's black and white and red all over A bloody penguin

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I was looking out the window on a Sunday morning. The coffee was fresh, and the air was moist. I had recieved a phone call last night on the contents of a briefcase that was to be left on my front door today. The explination was vague, and I was told to enjoy my last day. Then I died.

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? because he got ran over by a bus! (not a original, just funny)

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

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What did the black guy do to his neighbor's car while he was away? Wash it for a for as a favor.

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how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

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Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

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Wanna hear an anti-joke?

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An Irish, an English, a Chinese and a French are together in a boat. And it shows the diversity of our society.

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Chuck Norris screams in pain.

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jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

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I love pissing people off :P

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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