What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

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Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

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What did Helen Keller say to the leper? Buaaaaguuuhloo

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. His death was mourned by his wife and three children who wished he would not have been so reckless.

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whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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An English man walks into a pub.

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Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

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Why doesn't little billy eat his vegetables at the dinner table... Because billy has bin dead for 3 years

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

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What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

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My sister had a lemonade stand once. And one time, she spilled.

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

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A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

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Racism is like black people... It should not exists...

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Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Adam Chebali goes to war and is quickly killed. The rest of the world rejoices as he can no longer post anti-jokes only he thinks are funny and brag about himself on anti-joke.com.

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You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

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A bar walks into a man... Wait...

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What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

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Q: What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A Good Start.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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