A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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