What do you say to a woman in the kitchen? Cook me some food.

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What's the differrence between a park bench and a black person... A park bench can support a family

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch". The nearby patrons ask him what is ailing him.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot.

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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Ask me if I am an orange. "Are you an orange?" No.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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Wanna hear an inside joke? Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the black men.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You touch yourself. I do, too.

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Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

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What did the creepy old man do to the child? Took him to baseball practice

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What's black and blue and red all over? Due to the infinite nature of the universe many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner.

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Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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Guess what? You just lost the game.

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What's more fun than nailing babies to a wall? Ripping them off again.

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Q: What has two wheels and is not funny? A:Ryan Vallee on a segway -Ryan V

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A women leaves the kitchen.

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What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

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Knock Knock Dude i am not going to answer the door

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation can be known as fishing for compliments or reassurance of your value as a human being. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops