Roses are red, Violets are red, Shrubs are red, Trees are red, Holy shit my garden's on fire!

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The song Friday Rules!

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Ask me if I am an orange. "Are you an orange?" No.

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your gay

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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why did my girlfriend get pregnet? i didn's use a condom, and my semen entered her long muscular tube, also known as a vagina.

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What is the same about a bird and a turtle? They can both fly . . . except for the turtle

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Q. Why did the man crash the car? A. Because the driver was a bling man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

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why is yo mamma fat? cause she likes doughnuts

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A horse walks into a bar, The bar tender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies, "my wife has terminal cancer"

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A boy walks into a baker, asks for a loaf of bread. The baker enquires "White or brown?" to which the boy replies "It doesn't matter, I've got my bike."

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Roses are red Violets are blue You touch yourself. I do, too.

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Wanna hear an inside joke? Cancer.

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A dog goes into a bar. He is wearing an eye patch. The dog says to the bartender, "Have you heard the one about the one-eyed dog?" The bartender, who is deaf in one ear, thinks the dog is making fun of him. He asks him to leave. The dog says, "Don't you have a sense of humor, deafie?" At the end of his shift, the bartender is tired of all the jokes. Today it's a one-eyed dog. Yesterday it was a horse with rickets. The day before: ants. He lives above the bar, in a small room. He spends the night alone there, listing to his battery operated radio, which picks up only a bad jazz station. He listens to bad jazz with his bad ear.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

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Robert dupras dick size :3

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch". The nearby patrons ask him what is ailing him.

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Guess what? You just lost the game.

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Knock knock! "Who's there?" "It's me, xx" "Okay, come in."

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Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but if you set him on fire, he'll die

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What's grosser than gross? Grossest.

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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