whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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hi, im sober.

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

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What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

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Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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japan4.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to rape him.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

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Women's rights.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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Why is the sky blue? Because when you look up at the sky, especially during the daytime, the sky is giving a bluish color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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