Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

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What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

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why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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