I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

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What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin' with his family

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, you're entire family is dead.

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What do you call a bus filled with White, Chinese, and Black people? Public transportation.

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An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

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What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

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Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

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Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

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Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

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A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

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Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

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Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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