a customer walks into a store and says, "the customer is always wrong." the employee replies, "no, the customer is always right." "you just contradicted yourself."

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My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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mom:why oh why are you such an idiotic nuisance? bobby:THATS HOW YOU WANTED ME BORN!!REMEMBER?you asked the doctor to put something in me to make me so stupid i wouldnt remember WHO gave birth to me!!

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

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What is small and gives people courage? Certain kinds of illegal drugs

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what do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A: a piolt

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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What is worse then finding a worm in your apple!? Getting raped!

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How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get in the car.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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The Game

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what happened to the boy who crossed the street. he got shot by a bus

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My children are huge mistakes.

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Q: What happened to the blonde who tried to commit suicide? A: She died.

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Old guitars sound like cat's guts

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

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An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

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Why did the black surgeon get fired? The hospital was low on funds due to the economic crisis, and had to let a few employees go.

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Why did the baboon fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

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knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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