What's the difference between a duck

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Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? He was Happy

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?u?? ????? ????? '?? p??? o? u?op ?p?sdn s??? p?dd??? no? ??

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

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Why didn't the gangster cross the road? Because he J-walked and was hit by a car.

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Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cause 7 was a petophile and 6 has four children

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Where does the Queen keep her armies? In various military bases across the country.

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WELCOME TO THE SECRET BEYOND THE SIXTH SENSE! 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :(

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Enough with the "whats worse than ... "jokes! They are getting old and have a millon different possible answers. I am aware that this is not a joke but thumbs up if you aggree with.

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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im not as random as you think I- Potato

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I like the way he thinks. Too bad he has alzheimers.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

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what was the biggest game of hide and seek? World War II and the Jews won

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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Why was the little boy afraid of Mr.Clean? Because he reminded him of his father who was an alcoholic and used to beat him savagely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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