What's worse than a snake in your boot. A boot in your snake.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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How do you make a clown sad? Rape his wife, choke his grandma and send him a video of you setting his children on fire.

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Q:What did the man say when he walked into a bar. A: Ouch

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Cancer

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? There was a huge pile of dead babies blocking his path.

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they call me the green lantern because my little sister died in chemical fire

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-646-2835 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names travis

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!!!!!!¡¡¡¡

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why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

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shitted on em put your numbah 2s in the air if ya did it on em

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What do you do with a pickle jar full of semen? Use it for gel, because it took so long to collect it all, and you're frugal person who believes in recycling.

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What's long, hard, and filled with semen? A submarine

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why were Tamika and Tyron afraid to get into the water? They weren't

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whos the bitch now!?! you are.

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Women's rights

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Why did Suzie fall off her swing? She was dead

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What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

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Why did the man laugh when he saw someone using a shake weight? He remembered Dane Cook's stand up preformance from the night before.

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Q: What did the Kool-Aid Man say when he crashed through a wall? A: "OW! That hurt!"

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What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

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What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

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How does one peel a potato? First I would suggest going to your local grocery store, and purchasing a vegetable peeler (although, in fact, the potato is not considered a vegetable). Once at home, I recommend disinfecting it of germs. Unless you already own a vegetable peeler, in which case I would simply peel the potato as every normal human would.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops