What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

Minecraft.

Two horses, a man with a tall bun, three lesbians, an African woman and another man wearing a clown suit come up to you in your work outfit and shriek:"Happy Casual Friday!" Okay, so maybe this went too far.

Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

Roses are violets red is blue i like lizards they have fur

when im sad im feel horny i rape little children -jimmy saville , last words of the diary

Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

Billy: hey dave, wanna hear a joke? Dave: what? Billy: oh yeah, you are deaf.

What did little Jimmy say when he saw a group of dancing blue penguins dressed as cannibal clowns with saucers on their head ? "What the f*ck"

How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

Q:Why did suzie fall off the swing A:She had no arms

Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

What's the difference in a red sports car and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a red sports car in my garage.

Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

how do you stop a bus? shout FOR ALLAH!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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