A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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What's the difference between a duck? One of it's feet are both yellow.

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Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

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your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

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You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

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Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

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Women's rights

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*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

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Q: Why cant dinosaurs talk A: Because they are dead.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

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Q: WHY DID GOD MAKE ASIANS? A: NO FREIKEN IDEA

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What's worse than an explosion? A nuclear explosion.

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do you like walffles?Yes I like walffles!

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2 out of 4 questions. How do you get an elephant in a fridge? Open it, take the girrafe out, put the elephant in, and close it.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat

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If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

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Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

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What do you call somebody from Manchester? A twat

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a man i knew who was a real jerk was about to drive home drunk. i was trying to stop him, but then he punched me in the face. i let him through. he died that night. i texted him all the way

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hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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