What did the bodybuilder do when someone stole his wallet? Ab workouts.

Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

knock knock who's there doctor doctor who No

What's yellow and lays in a tree? Tweety the Whore

What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

Man 1: Your lifes a joke Man 2: Your talking to yourself Man 1 klled himself Man 2 had cancer

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

Why did the fat guy sit on another guy? They were in a wrestling match.

What is the difference between a dead baby in a blender and a rock? There are many differences. One of them is the fact that I don't masturbate to a rock.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

What do you call a black astronaut? It depends on what his name is.

my nAME IS ALAN AND IM NOT COOL

Why is Santa's sack so big? He has a malignant tumour on his testicle. We're all very worried about him.

Jews

Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

what does a man with no leg say to a woman with one eye? hello. by Mad James

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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