Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

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What did the boy find on his laptop? -Nothing, he comes from a broken home and can't afford one.

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The Game.

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Person 1: What did the narwhal say to the other narwhal. Person 2: I don't know... What? Person 1: How am I supposed to know? Shortly after a serious argument breaks out.

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Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

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The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

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Matt is not funny.

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The red guy lives in the red house, the green guy lives in the green house, and the blue guy lives in the blue house. Who lives in the white house? The purple guy, he just hasn't painted his house yet.

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how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

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Badgers are cool

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

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why did the puppy poop? he had too

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Johnny got hit by a bomb. Where is he now? Everywhere. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Johnny

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Why did the tree catch on fire? A phinix hit it!

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what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your family die in a fire.

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4

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i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

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Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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