A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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Knock Knock.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A fossil.

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Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

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FUCK YOU NEVEN

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I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

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What's worse than an anti-joke? People who don't get the concept of an anti-joke and post regular jokes on this site.

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Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

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Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

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Whats the differance between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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what happened to the man with no arms or legs when he was pushed down a hill? nobody knows he is still going ........................................................................

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Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

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Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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What did the man say when he was asked if he recently saw a mime painting a lawn chair in the middle of December? "No." , and walked away, slightly confused by the matter.

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Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff? Because after twenty long years of monotonous nagging, he finally snapped.

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The WNBA

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tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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