Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to....

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Cows go moo.

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What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

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Q: what is funny today A: your parents died in a horrible car accident

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why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

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A: Knock Knock! B: Come in!

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Dick spice

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says"what can i get for you Sarah Jessica Parker"

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What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

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OMG this totally works! Step 1: Hold your breath Step 2: Die

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

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Biggest lie ever told... Mrs. Beiber, its a boy.

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What did Pikachu tell Ash? "Pikachu."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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How do you stop the unstoppable You dont

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Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

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person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

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An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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A horse cantered into a bar.

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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Why did the boy fall down the stairs Because I pushed him

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Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops