Q: Why was the blonde in a black car? A: Becasue the car was a herse and she was killed a week before in an accident where the other driver was drunk Becasue his wife had left him with no money and no kids to come home to.

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Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

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omg this doesn't work 1.hold breath for 5 minutes 2.die it doesn't work cause you would just knock yourself unconconsiuse and your body will start breathing for you again until you wake up

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A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

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What did the white guy said to the black guy, when he stepped on his foot? Excuse me.

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Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? hes all right now

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Why does Michael Jackson have difficulty playing chess? Because he's dead, and if there is an afterlife, we don't actually have the ability to know that it is possible to play chess there.

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What do you call a fish with no "eyes" Dead

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Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

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Justin Beiber

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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http://attachments.conceptart.org/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=351301&stc=1&d=1208673890

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How do you kill the President of the United States? Your name has been reported to the authorities.

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Dancing Potatoe!

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What do you get when mix an orange with juice? Orange juice.

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My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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when Bonquisha and Letroy had a baby girl what did they name her? Courtney.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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