How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

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How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

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Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

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Kah-________-

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue A Face Like Yours Belongs In The ZOO. :o

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

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Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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A muslim walked into a bar. Then he walked out because he had made a wrong turn.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I ate your horse.

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im a ginger and i get beat up everyday

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Yo mama is so fat, she is thinking of going on a diet.

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What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

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If pinocchio said "my nose is going to grow", what would happen?

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Jay Leno: The economy is so bad.. Audience: how bad is it?! Jay Leno: Very bad.

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Fire extinguishers are sexy.

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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