If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

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Q: What did one blind girl ask the other? A: Where are you?

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A boy eats 3 pounds of candy, 2 whole pizzas, and drinks 10 beers. Why did he puke? Someone came out of nowhere, and kicked him in the nuts

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What do you call a group of men terrible at their jobs? The Mets

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So, this guy walks into the doctor's and says: "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says: "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks... ...into an alleyway to have a quick smoke before entering the bar his friends went in.

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What's worse than falling off your bike? Getting hit by a truck.

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A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

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A rabbit enters in apharmacy and asks for a carrot. The man says:"There aren´t any carrots in here." In the next two days the same happens, but the man replies that he'll hammer the rabbit if he comes back. In the other day, the rabbit is found dead with a bloody hammer nearby.

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Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

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The NHL playoffs

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken!!!!!

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Chuck Norris watches TV.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

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Knock Knock Who is there? 9-11 9-11 who? You said you would never forget.

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I Love You Jordan! P.S. from someone you know

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How can you tell which kids belong to Dolly Parton? From the strech marks on their lips :|

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-Knock knock. -Who's there? -Doctor. -Docter who? -Yes...

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what does a black car sound like when it starts? RUN-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA -GRANT PARK ALL THE WAY

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Q)Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? A)Because the P is silent.

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Why did the man explode when he ate the cheeseburger? Because the man was actually a bomb.

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What do you get when you cross a polar bear and a vampire? A Vampire Polar Bear.

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a man walks into a bar..... OWW!!!!!!

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What was the sadest part about the four blacks who drove off a cliff in a cadilac? -The car sat five

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops