Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

Why wasnt the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled

What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

What's brown and sticky? Poo

Women's rights.

69

What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

If there are 500 bricks in an airplane and one falls out how many are there in he plane? 499. Name 3 steps to get a Elephant in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2. Put the Elephant in the fridge 3. Close the fridge Name 4 steps to get an Deer in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2.Take the Elephant out of the fridge 3. Put the Deer in the fridge 4. Close the fridge The Lion King is having a birthday party. Every animal came, besides one. Who was it? The Deer. Because hes trapped in the Fridge. The Deer manages to escape the fridge, and hes running late. he encounters Crocodile lake. How will he cross it? He will swim through it because the Crocodiles are at the Lion Kings birthday. Then suddenly, The Deer dies. How? The Brick hit him.

like for a handjob.

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stappled to the chicken.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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