What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

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Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

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Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

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Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, WTF is this, i gotta take a piss.

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

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A black man picks up his phone and calls his wife and finds out he had no wife

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

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Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

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Yo mama is so fat that you are constantly ridiculed by the local kids and constantly hope that the obesity isn't hereditary.

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In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. He then created the water, the sky, land, sea creatures, land creatures and humans. He rested.

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A Mormon walks into a bar.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

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What di the wrecking ball say to the house? Duck!!!

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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Q: What do you call a robot in a concert? A: Electric fan

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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