Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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A depressed gay teenager goes to his boyfriend’s house. Why and what happens? Shaun was often discriminated against for being homosexual. He always tried to be positive and a good person, but when his parents disowned him, Shaun couldn’t help but feel alone and unloved. Upset, Shaun went to his boyfriend’s house to seek comfort from his lover. Sunny, his boyfriend, immediately told Shaun that he loved him and things will get better for both of them. A year later, Shaun rebuilds his relationship with his old family and they apologize for their lack of understanding. Sunny and Shaun are very close emotionally, and wish to get married. However, they live in Texas, where marriage is outlawed. Shaun’s family agrees to help aid the couple financially in their marriage. They help Sunny and Shaun move to New York City where they had a successful gay marriage and pursued their dreams of becoming a video-game character designer/artist and a professional hop-hop dancer, respectively. They adopt their first child two months later and raise their child positively, and adopt her younger sister five months after that. The two daughters love their two dads and grow up to be a successful NASA scientist and a talented singer, respectively. Sunny and Shaun live a long, happy life together filled with love, happy, and joy. They die peacefully in their nineties.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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A black man picks up his phone and calls his wife and finds out he had no wife

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, WTF is this, i gotta take a piss.

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Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

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Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

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Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

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What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

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What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

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Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

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Yo mama is so fat that you are constantly ridiculed by the local kids and constantly hope that the obesity isn't hereditary.

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A Mormon walks into a bar.

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In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. He then created the water, the sky, land, sea creatures, land creatures and humans. He rested.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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What di the wrecking ball say to the house? Duck!!!

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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