Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +34

your momma is so stupid she failed math class

thumb_up thumb_down +34

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

thumb_up thumb_down +34

flip flop chop, clip clop cow, POW. hahahahahah. :).

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

minced oaths

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A black man, an Asian man, and a white man are stranded in the wilderness after their plane crashed. The black man has a flashlight, the Asian a bottle of water, and the white man a can of beans. They put their racial differences aside to increase chance of survival but were eaten by a pack of coyotes.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Hey are you from Tennessee, 'cause you have a very nice accent.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

look left now look right. washing machine

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops