What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I HATE EVERYTHING OMG PEOPLE SUCK BOYS SUCK IM TAKING MY RAGE OUT ON THE INTERNET FDJKNDLKXC

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a truck? You drive a truck, Michael Jackson has anal sex with little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the guy kill his friends? He didn't, he doesn't have any friends

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

thumb_up thumb_down -43

A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

As a wise man once told me... "natives."

thumb_up thumb_down +54

i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

There is a car full of black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What do you get when you cross an African-American, a bird, and ice cream? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

your mother's head is so big that she wears very big hats.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

hi

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops