What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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KEVIN HART

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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What do you call a group of Mexicans crossing the U.S. border? A travel soccer team.

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

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A women walks out of a kitchen.

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Women's rights.

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You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

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Women

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why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

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Tacos

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Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

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Justin Littleton getting laid.

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Blonde: "What does IDK stand for?" Brunette: "I don’t know." Blonde: "OMG, nobody does!"

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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