What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

thumb_up thumb_down +32

the joke below me is not an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +30

25

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops