Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

What is a Will And Dan put together A WillDan HAHAHAHAHA

What's the worst thing about that Black Jew at the Bus Stop? He's taking a bus to go to his mother's funeral.

There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

why did Mark Nara cross the road idk why? he didnt

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? That boy that dropped a perfectly good ice cream cone from a road accident involving a bus due to lack of road safety awareness Oh yeah, and I guess the fact that he probably died or was injured for life is pretty bad too

What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

why did the black man jump higher than the white man he was on a trampoline

Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...