My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whos on the right track? lady gaga

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

roses are red poo is poo

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops