What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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I have a dirty joke. Yesterday I fell in the mud.

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i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

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I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

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Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

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What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

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Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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what do you get when you cross a turkey with a goat? nothing you can't cross to genetically different spieces stupid

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Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

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What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

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Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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