Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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