Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

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How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didnt it got eaten

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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