What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

Brain fart

What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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