An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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