What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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women's rights.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

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Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

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So a bar walks into a man...

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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