When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

Gay rights.

Refridgerator.

Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

There's a study that the population of Americans are very high in America.

What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

how many scrubbers does it take to change a light bulb ? 2 , 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell piss

Why was the teenage girl bleeding from her vagina? Because I had shot her in her vagina with my gun earlier that day.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

What is worse than losing your phone charger... Being viciously raped by a group of angry vegans feminist mad at you for eating a burger, while walking out of Hooters.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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