A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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What's better than finding a $5.00 bill on the floor? Finding the person who actually owns it.

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

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What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know most poems rhyme, This one doesn't

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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first

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh hey Banana what's up? Nothing much. You? Oh nothing, I was just talking to Apple here. Oh hey Apple. Hey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops