how man

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

Do't you just hate when a sentence doesn't end how you think it will and it just octopus.

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

Gretta has five legs? -no

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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