Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says "Why the long face?" and the horse said "My wife died of terminal cancer"

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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What's better then a bad anti joke? A Good anti joke.

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suzy took a bath with bubbles what?......... I'm sure bubbles is a nice guy

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A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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