Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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I once had a friend We had our arguments, and went our separate ways.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops