What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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