Knock knock Who's there? To To be continued.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you confuse and anger a blonde? Kill her family and loved ones and say you did it because potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock Who's there? Barack obama

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. ... Hah.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Where can I apply for janitor school?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops