How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Your friend says "Hi" What do you say back? You say "chunky salsa?" She said "what?" You think she knows you made out with her boyfriend last night. So... You blurt out " I'm SO sorry I made out with your boyfriend lastnight" Know.... Your dead meat.

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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how many cody's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? impossible he so stupid!!!

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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An asian man walks into a taxi. The driver asked which chinese or electronic store woupd u like to go to?

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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poopy is poopy

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cot Death.

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops