who do we all like george goodburn

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what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

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Why was the man sad? His brother died.

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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Two blondes walk into a bar, but they are then puzzled as the door would not budge open for them.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

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Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

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Yogurt? You are joking right? I am having yogurt right now, do you like see trough me or something? I mean I have been told people can do that but no way!

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A high school student finally gets the nerve to ask his long-time crush on a date. They begin dating, and eventually settle down and get married. After six months of marriage, she dies in a car crash and he spends years in therapy.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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Scumbag steve walks into his friend's dorm room, and finds out he has epilepsy. He then flicks the lights on and off really fast

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HOLY COW!

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

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what did the penis say to the vagina? SMACK SMACK SMACK

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Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

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what would u di if u were having anal sex with a black guy and his dick was soooo bi that ir rippped ur asshole? staple it back together

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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