Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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