Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

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What do you call a man with a gun in his mouth? Keith.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

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Two penguins in a bath tub, one says "Pass me the soap" and the other one says "What do you think I am, a radio!"

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what is 3+3= 8

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Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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