How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

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Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

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What comes after 69? 70

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

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ARGH! LADY THAT SNAKE BIT MY PECKER! YOU HAVE TO SUCK THE POISON OUT NOW! OMG SURE, err...Meh, thats not a poisonous snake... Oh... dammit! I mean phew! Ouch ouch ouch!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Bill is driving along the Interstate.All the sudden, a refrigerator falls off the truck in front of him.The fridge slams into Bill's car.He dies instantly.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe, all mimsy were the borogoves and the momeraths outgrabe

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Whats 1+1? window!

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What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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Stop me if you heard this one before.

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why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

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what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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