Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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what the deference between a priest and acne well the acne doesn't come on the kids face tell hes thirteen

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What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

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whats your name whats the color of the sky whats the oppisite of down

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why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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how does bob marley like his doughnuts? Sugared

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems rhyme This doesn't.

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Q: How much dirt is in a hole 3 by 6 by 2 feet? A: There's no dirt, it's a hole.

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops