every knight i see an owl at window

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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What happens when you give a fat man scissors? He cuts off the foreskin of your penis.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. You're dog is dead. And so is your family.

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Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

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RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks, as he saw the first two men previously walking into it, and it looks like it rather hurt.

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Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

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What do u call a cripple Biv

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

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What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

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Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

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me and joey are going to watch the football game, at this point you relize you shouldn't hang out with joey and the other guy because it is joey and I not me and joey

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How do you hook up with a really hot chick? This website is intended for Anti-Jokes, Not Dating Advice.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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