Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

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A black man without problems.

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What did the snake say to the rat?

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

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9/11

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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What's better than group sex? Gang rape

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops